Role Play Ideas From Real-Life Couple Clark & Vivian
A beginner-friendly guide to role play ideas for couples, including how to start, communicate boundaries, and explore fantasy together. Video tutorial included!
Role play is a sexual act that allows couples to hit the refresh button in a relationship by inviting playful curiosity back into the mix. Whether you’re someone who already recognizes and understands themes within your sexual desire around role enactment, or you’re simply curious to figure out what the hell role play is and if you like it, this simple guide is all you need.
What is Role Play in Sex?
Role playing is when two (or more 😏) adults take on characters or scenarios to act out a fantasy or situation that differs from their everyday roles. Role play ideas for couples are truly endless, but to give you an idea, they can be:
- Light and playful (“we’re spies trying to save the world”)
- Romantic (“we’re on a first date again”)
- A playful exploration of sexual desire (“I like to be spanked and called daddy’s little cum slut.”)
The Benefits of Roleplaying
While the list is long, I’ll summarize. Role play can:
- Boost communication and trust
- Increase desire and novelty
- Allow expression of fantasies in a safe way
Is Role Play for You?
Based on Donald Mosher’s three main sexual styles—sex for role, sex for engagement, and sexual trance—those who naturally lean towards sex for role might prefer sexual experiences that have a bit more excitement, creativity, and fun. But that doesn’t mean role play is limited to those who like to mix it up often. If the idea of role play doesn’t spark an initial sexual desire for you, role play can still be used as a tool for couples to experiment sexually together while exploring individual and shared fantasies. Reframe it as a way to tap in and feel into the maybe’s and the what if’s.
See this guide as your definitive resource for role play ideas, practical steps to prepare, communication tools to make it comfortable, and actionable roleplaying ideas for couples at every level of experience.
How to Talk About Role Playing With Your Partner
Acting out a role can be intimidating. As with all sexual activities, the key to having a good time is communication first. Here’s how to approach the convo, step-by-step:
Step 1: Set the Stage for a Conversation
- Pick a neutral time—think about times in the day that both you and your partner tend to experience less stress.
- Tell your partner what you’re curious about, not what they must do.
- Use “I” statements: “I’ve been thinking about exploring role play. Would you be open to hearing what turns me on when I think about it?”
Step 2: Share Boundaries and Comfort Levels
A useful method is to create a yes/no/maybe list.
- Yes: Things you’re definitely interested in trying.
- Maybe: Things you might try depending on mood or comfort.
- No: Absolute boundaries—don’t worry, this is a judgment-free zone.
Step 3: Establish Safe Words
Especially for scenarios that might push emotional or physical boundaries, agree on a simple safe word system. Here’s an example you can use:
- Green: Comfortable, continue
- Yellow: Slow down, check in
- Red: Stop immediately
Peek Behind Closed Doors — Watch Real Amateurs
How to Pick the Right Role Play Idea
This is where the fun starts. Let yourself feel into what your vibe is. Here’s a simple formula:
- Interest: Does it genuinely intrigue you?
- Comfort: Would you and your partner feel safe and respected?
- Feasibility: Can you perform it with items you already have?
- Adaptability: Can it be playful or serious depending on mood?
Keep in mind, the best roleplaying ideas for couples are ones that strengthen your connection rather than creating pressure.
Roleplaying for Couples: Warm Up
Once you’ve scheduled the time in your calendar for your role play session with your partner and the time has come, try this simple warm-up exercise to get things going:
- Pick an animal, any animal. For the purpose of this exercise, try to agree on the animal with your partner. Let’s say you choose a bear.
- Answer these questions using movement, sound, and breath.
- What shape does (a bear) make?
- What sound does (a bear) make?
- What movement does (a bear) make?
- Now, how does your animal persona want to interact with the other in front of it?
- Reflect by asking yourself these questions:
- What did you feel while leaning into this animal persona?
- What about these feelings did you like or dislike?
- Were there any characteristics present in this persona that turned you on?
5 Roleplaying Ideas for Couples to Try Tonight
Now that you’ve shaken off some nerves and had the chance to settle into yourself, let’s take a look at different role play ideas for couples. Go through this list alone or with your partner and start to create a yes/no/maybe list.
1. First Date Again
Recreate your first date, or have a new one:
- Dress up like you’re meeting for the first time.
- Meet in another room or part of your home.
- Start with small talk, laughter, and a shared drink.
2. Stranger at a Bar
You meet for “the first time” again.
- Use simple props: an outfit that never gets worn, a wig, or a hat.
- Speak in character names, or even accents if you’re up for the challenge.
3. Co-Workers on a Business Trip
You and your partner are traveling for work.
- One of you is the boss, the other the assistant.
- Tune into the power dynamics present, if any.
- You get “stuck” in a hotel lounge or an airport.
4. Professor and Student
Remember, this is a consensual fantasy between equals, so go on and put on that plaid mini skirt and tell the sexy professor you need to be spanked in detention.
- Assign roles with safe boundaries.
- Use simple props: glasses or a notebook.
- Tune into the power dynamics present.
- Focus on building tension and reward through praise, encouragement, and playful tasks.
5. Characters From Fiction
Pick a character dynamic from your favorite series, movie, or book.
- Explore the dynamic between two characters—what about their dynamic do you like? Dislike?
- Bring voice or wardrobe cues into it (costumes optional).
How to Prepare For Role Play
Sex doesn’t always have to be spontaneous; sometimes it can be fun to think things through.
Environment Matters
Creating a space that feels safe for sexual exploration.
- How can you rearrange your environment in a low-lift way to make your fantasy feel more real? Or is there somewhere you can go to help get into character?
- A music playlist to fit the mood.
- Minimal interruptions—put phones on silent. There’s nothing like your mom calling when you’re acting out your naughty nurse fantasy to really kill the mood.
Props & Costumes
Props don’t need to be expensive.
- Scarves, hats, jackets, sunglasses—a small item can go a long way in establishing a fantasy.
Script or No Script
You can absolutely wing it, but some couples enjoy a loose outline like:
- Set the scene
- Establish characters
- Start with a flirty line to get into character—it’s ok if you feel weird at first, give yourself time to sink into your role, and tune into what turns you on about this fantasy for support.
- Let things naturally escalate. If you are struggling to let go of your character to step into a new one, this can be a great time to lean into a script.
Final Role Play Tips
Remember, sex is meant to be fun. Here are a few final things to keep in mind:
- Start slow: Let comfort and curiosity build over time.
- Keep it flexible: Change roles or scenarios based on mood.
- Laugh it out: Fun will bond you just as much as exploring your fantasy.
- Respect each other’s limits: If someone isn’t feeling something, there shouldn’t be any pressure to continue.
